Glutton for Punishment?? Or Blessed??

Second Chances.

Are they a good thing?

Or are they a bad thing?

I have really been thinking about this a lot lately. I know that we all make stupid mistakes. And we all do things that we really wish we had never done. And we hope and we pray that the people that were involved or that might know what we did will soon forget, and will learn how to forgive us for what we have done. But so often we are not the person who made the mistake. So many times we are on the other end of the situation. We happened to witness someone do something unsavory, or silly. Or someone did something to us that was far less than kind. And the big question is, how do we react to that. Do we forgive them? Completely forgive them? And by completely forgive, I mean, if we were placed in the same situation again, would we give them a second chance and let them prove that they have grown and changed? Or do we choose to protect ourselves and keep a part of that with us. If the same situation came up again would we stop it right from the beginning and think that we are so smart. We learned from the situation and we will never let them hurt us again. It seems to me like this is a double edged sword. If we give them a second chance, we are opening ourselves up to be hurt again. But by not giving them a second chance, we are hurting ourselves by not letting them win back what ever was lost by their actions.
Call me crazy, or call me blessed, but I try super hard to fully forgive. And yes, some times it hurts. And some times it blows up in my face. And trust me, getting hurt by the same thing, for the second time, really hurts! But its a choice that I make. Why? Because I have made mistakes. I have been mean and rude and I have done things I am ashamed of. And I want to be able to prove that I have changed. Prove that I have risen above the old me and I have made myself into something better. And all to often, I am not given that chance. And I have had times where I have been forgiven. And because of it, I have great friends and amazing memories.

So.. by giving people second chances.. Are you Glutton for punishment?? Or are you opening yourself up to be blessed?

Fun Fun Fun

Well, me and Keisha decided that since it was her last night up here that we were going to live it up. And boy did we. First we went up to studio 600. Its dance club. We got up there about 10:15. We left at one. Man my legs were tired. While at the club we met some boys and they invited us to go hang out with them afterward. We leave the club and we get pulled over. Looks like Daniel peed in the parking lot. And he got a ticket. Ha ha Daniel. After his ticket, road trip to Tooele. Super great. We get out there and we go out to this haunted hospital. So scary. I made my new friend Daniel stay super close to me. I'm sure he didn't mind though. Keisha got so scared that she started to hyperventilate. It was super great. A rush for sure. After that we went down to this rail road track and we jumped up on a train car. Its filled with little plastic beads. And you can jump down in there and lay in them. But they were way to low, so if we jumped in there, we would have been stuck. So we ditched that and went and threw rocks in the lake. After that, we were freezing, so we went over to his friends house and played x box. I check the time and its 4 am. Crap! Its 4 am and we are in Tooele. We still have to drive over an hour back to Provo. And I have to work at 8 am. Uh oh. So we leave and we get pulled over right away. Two times in one night. Wow. The officer asks for drivers licence and registration. And I ask what we did. He said that the color of the car did not match the registration. Liar! We checked. It did. But then he comes back and asks if we were out walking around, and we told him no, that we came from a friends house where we were just playing x box. So.. long story short.. at the railroad they caught us on camera. Uh oh. And we could have gotten arrested, but he could not prove it was us right then. So we were safe. Phew.
I felt like such a rebel, but in a good way. All in all, we really did not get into trouble, and I kept my nose clean. I did not do anything immoral or anything that I would have to tell the bishop about. And that makes me super happy. I can have loads of fun with out ruining my spirit.
As I sit here at work now, and its 2:45 I'm dying. I am really tired, but I think I am still running on an adrenaline rush. So, its all OK.
Life is great!

Blessed in ways I never knew I could be blessed.

Yep.. Three posts in one day. I just have so much to share, and so much that I am feeling. I was talking to my mother, and told her that my ex is dating someone new, and she said, welp, looks like you finally get a new start. And its true.

I am finally meeting with the bishop and getting everything on that end cleared up. I no longer have a chance of getting back with my ex. And I am starting school with a new major. My life is finally starting new. No more sitting around waiting for things to happen. Time to get up and get things done.

I'm so grateful for the chance to start new and to begin a new page in my life. There is no where to go but up from here. I finally feel like I'm in the right spot, at the right time. And things are going how they are supposed to be going. I just need to be strong and not slip back into the slum that I was hanging out in.

Im loved

If you could not have guessed it.. Well I got a pretty good kick in the shorts today. I found out that my ex has someone new. It really should not be that big of a deal, but it is. It sucks a big one. As I have been thinking about it, I realize that i just have to trust that the lord knows me and that everything is going to be ok. This is what my horoscope was today: Someone has to remind you of a limitation that you had completely forgotten -- but you ought to still have enough flexibility to work around it. If not, it's a good time for you to ask for help from above.

uh.. wow. Really.. thats all that can be said about a moment like that. Looks like my Heavenly Father really is trying to reach out and get in touch with me. He really does love me and he is fighting for me and trying to get me to see that he loves me. I just have to slow down enough, and realize it.

Being Alone VS Being Lonley

I found out today that there is a huge difference in being alone and being lonely. Yes, I am alone. I am not dating anyone, but I am not lonely. I have the greatest friends in the whole wide world. They are always there for me, and at the drop of a hat, they would do anything for me. I don't know what I would do with out them.

So, thank you everyone that has ever been there for me. And thank you for being my friend. You can never have to many friends.

Love you all!

Misery Loves company.

As I lean back in my chair at work and rub my belly, I laugh. Laugh because I just ate ten Mcdonalds chicken nuggets. Laugh because I also ate a cheeseburger... and mainly I laugh to stop from crying. If I keep heading down the road I am on, I am going to be a blimp. I really need to start eating healthy, but you know.. Aunt Flow is coming to visit, and im getting a cold. You could generally say that I am feeling pretty miserable. And all I needed was a big hug from some fattening food.

One happy note though... Me and Oprah are the same height, but I weigh less than her. :) She is weighing it at the big 2 o o... thats right.. 200 lbs. I know that i should not be happy about that.. but I am. I love every minute of it. Guess its true.. misery loves company.

Uhhggghh....

So, last week, I worked out, I ate fairly decently, and you know what.. Nothing. My muscles feel a little more defined, but other than that.. nothing. No weight loss, no smaller pants sizes, no compliments on how amazing it is that I actually made my lazy but work out.

Ok ok.. So I will admit that I am starting to get a cold, and I spend way to much time staying up at night watching movies with my neighbor. I need to go to bed early, and let my poor body get some rest.

In fact, I am in a state of delirium right now. That is why this is not making much sense.

Long story shot.. last week I worked out a lot and stayed up way too late. And the outcome.. my poor body is tired beyond belief and I feel like I might give up this quest to have a great body.